To want a cup of tea in bed in the morning?

I know … I know … Sounds very entitled BUT I do so much in the house and 15 minutes of ‘coming to’ whilst sipping tea is now, sadly, one of the things that’s really important to me given how much else I do: housework, work, study, look after everyone else.

So, now I’m reduced to making a flask and carrying it upstairs at night so it’s on hand at 7am. It just seems very sad that I’m having to do this – indicative that no-one gives a flying fuck or appreciates all that I do. It’s such a small thing but huge to me.

As a child, I saw my dad make my mum tea every day before going to work, so that’s left its mark, I guess. That tenderness and care, realised through the tiniest of gestures, was so important. No-one bothers for me – not OH (knows but can’t be arsed); 15 yr old (busy doing make-up/hair) and 10 yr old (too young). Yes, I’m feeling sorry for myself this morning. Hey ho.


Cleaner keeps going in the condom pot!

We have had a cleaner for 3 weeks, never had one before. When she comes I keep out of her way. She does upstairs on a Tuesday and downstairs on a Friday. I stay downstairs when shes upstairs and upstairs when shes downstairs.

My husband and I keep our condoms in a trinket pot at the back of the drawer in his bedside table.

Last Tuesday I went in the drawer for something and noticed the lid was off. Its not possible for the lid to be just knocked off.

Yesterday I checked the drawer after cleaner had gone and whist the lid was on, the condoms had been messed with, they weren’t in a pile. I’d left them in a pile on purpose to see if they were messed with. None had been taken out.

I am pregnant so we’re not using them! DH has been away since last Wednesday and is home today so I know it,s not him. The only explanation is the cleaner.

But why???#

To have finally put my niece in her place after taunting my daughter for what she wears?

I have a ten year old Dd and an 8 almost 9 year old niece. For a while now when have vsisted my SiL’s house or been on a day out together my niece takes it upon herself to carefully “assess” what my dd is wearing and if she doesn’t like it then she doesn’t hide it.

My Dd is quite a sensitive child and whilst she can usually brush off any teasing she is now sick of her cousin constantly scrutinising what she wears and making fun of her. I’ve had words with my SiL about this in the past but she just brushes it off sayid that she will “have words with her” but still it continues.

Well today we have been out for our annual Christmas meal, my Dd was dressed lovely yet as per my niece decided to have digs at her telling her that she looks stupid and that’s not how her fiends dress. My SiL was sat right next to my niece and then my Dd next to her so she would have heard what she was saying, yet she chose to ignore it. My niece carried on and by this point my Dd was almost in tears so I decided to say something. I told my niece that at least my Dd dresses for her age, she wears clothes that are comfortable and stylish instead of walking round in belly tops and leggings with her backside hanging out! Now you can guess that after blatantly ignoring her dd calling my dd my SiL happened to hear what I had to say didn’t she?…..well she wasn’t happy. But you know what…..tough, why should I let my not so darling niece ridicule for my dd yet again who by the way dresses lovely usually wearing smart skinny jeans with jewelled tops, body warmer, and smart hi tops, or gorgeous skirt top sets etc. She doesn’t walk round looking like she’s a teenager like my 8 year old niece does flashing her arse and belly, so Aibu for finally saying something? My Dh doesn’t think I am as he’s admitted his niece is a little madam but maybe I could have timed it better.

You made a child cry and can’t write in sentences. You’ve come out of this pretty well, congratulations.

is this makeup on my husbands collar?

Please help. My husband’s car is broken for the past 3 weeks so he has been getting a lift home with a male work colleague. Anyway the other night I did the washing and on his white shirt was orange brown marks on the collar which looked like makeup to me. I confronted him and asked who dropped him home, he lied and I said don’t lie and then he finally told me a female colleague gave him a lift home. I went mad but he said he knew I would be mad as a female. Anyway I questioned him about the makeup and he said it wasn’t makeup and it was dirt.

I then contacted this woman on Facebook (which I regret but was in the heat of the moment) and asked if anything was going on. She said is that a serious question? I have a boyfriend of 9 years. I gave your husband a lift home as a favour today and she’s only ever given him a lift once.

But how does this explain the makeup? He said believe him or he’s walking and he’s so embarrassed to face his colleague now. please see pic, she said nothing happened. also I checked his shirts the last two days, nothing on there but surely if dirt or sweat it would be on every shirt?

She said her bf was sitting next to her while she was replying to me so she could be lying as she has as much too loose as him. He isn’t secretive with his phone or anything but I think it’s too much of a coincidence this on his shirt same day he lied about the lift? I also asked if he hugged anyone that day and he said no and its dirt, he was so angry that he had to go to work also and front her.

…to plan on walking out of work at 1.30 on Friday?

Its my daughters Nativity, her first one.

This week sees the implementation of a project at work that I am massively involved in. All.of my week is spent on training and development and we “go live” Friday.

As soon as I found out the Nativity date I spoke with my line manager about getting away at 1.30 on Friday, for it, and offered to return after it til whenever I was needed. Our industry is 365 days a year, 24 hrs a day. I am rostered to work til 3.30pm.

It was not well received, and I have been told “this really isnt the best week for this” and my direct line manager has cancelled a lunch date with her own friends on that day.

AIBU or WIBU to remain insistant that I need to leave at 1.30, and to feel that my reason is more important than a lunch date with a friend?

WWYD? Would you leave?

Fwiw I would not be leaving the place understaffed, I am surplus this week as dedicated solely to the new project. We also have tech support in all week and they are there Fri purely for troubleshooting after going live.

By all means, wander out on the most important day of the project. Your colleagues will love you.

…to absolutely HATE football?

DH is a fan and a few years ago decided to get a season ticket for our local team. DD had been along a couple of times and MIL offered to pay for her to have one too.

This is her 4th season I think – she’s now 11 and whilst she’s not uninterested in the footy, she mostly enjoys the social side (as well a DH her uncle and another friend and his DC go) and visiting the chip shop en route.

This is all well and good but it takes up so much bloody time. Every Saturday there is a home match on they’re out from about 12.30 – 6.30pm at least so we cannot do anything as a family and DD can’t make arrangements with friends, and of course because it is already paid for she ‘has’ to go.

This month completely takes the piss – they have 5 matches and a Christmas party (not including the away game that DH is going to on Boxing Day) between now and 1st January.

TBH I hate the whole culture of football anyway, but trying to bend over backwards to fit in other things around all this is really getting on my tits. I need to take DD shopping for DH’s present, she wants to put the decorations up with me and have her best friend for a sleepover. She has clubs two evenings a week, music practice and two homework projects to finish before the end of term. I’ve got work and social commitments as well so it’s just a huge stress trying to work everything around bloody football.

I’m not about to throw a hissy fit to DH and DD but AIBU to be silently(ish) seething about how much this is getting in the way of life in general atm, and hope DD decides to pack it in next year (she has already mentioned that she might to MIL who then phoned me demanding to know whyhmm)?

To throw away the landlord’s shit in the loft?

We’ve just moved in to a nice house. The landlady mentioned that the loft was partly boarded out and that they’d left “a couple of boxes in the very back that we couldn’t reach.”

I just went to stow some things and pretty most of the boarded out space is full of their stuff. It’s about a dozen or so cartons of crap. Mostly toys and holiday decorations.

None of this is on the inventory. I’d like to use that space for our empty suitcases, camping gear, etc. There’s already a large shed full of their stuff that I grudgingly accept we can’t use. But the loft situation annoys me.

DH feels it would be wrong to empty the loft. I have been in this situation before (previous landlord was much, much worse and I did throw everything away.) I just have no patience for this. I think it’s infantile to be unable to take responsibility for your belongings. If they can’t be bothered to move it, or even inventory it, then they clearly can’t really care about it.

The first carton I looked in had what was clearly a well-loved child’s teddy. Even I don’t have the heart to toss that. But what about the other stuff?